A Wedding and a Funeral

We went on this way for a couple more months...

I was actually doing pretty good, though. I was spending more time at work than I was with him, and I think that did my heart and mind good.

Don's sister had met a guy around the same time he and I had met. She was my age, and her soon-to-be-husband was a little older than her. They were getting married in November, and it was really an exciting time for everyone.

The wedding went well, and when we were at the reception, an unexpected visitor sat with us at the family table... it was his first girlfriend, Sharon! Yes, she had been invited to the wedding, and at this point, I also didn't know that she had been visiting my boyfriend on his job. Talk about uncomfortable!

Besides that, I was crushed. I didn't know why his family would invite her to sit with the family with me there, too. It didn't make a lot of sense, and it was very upsetting and hurtful.

When we got home from the wedding, oh my gosh, I was soooooo upset! Of course, it was his sister's wedding...not mine. But I expressed my grief at the whole situation, and I distinctly remember being thrown by my neck onto the ground, him sitting on me, screaming in my face, how his problems in life were all my fault. He yelled and yelled at me, hurting me even more.

I wonder now if I started thinking that maybe he was right. Maybe his issues were really my fault. I mean, I'm the one standing in the way of his having fun in life, right?

I couldn't wait for Monday to come so I could go to work and away from him.

Of course, he apologized, said it would never happen again, how he loves me, blah, blah, blah.

And I forgave him. At least, I think I did. Obviously, however, I have not forgotten. I don't think you ever really forget.

A few weeks later, my grandfather had a stroke. He was not going to make it out of this one, as he had several others.

Now, my grandma, she was great. She loved me very much. When I first moved out, she asked me to come to her house (which was about 100 miles away), and she loaded my car down with all kinds of things. I don't really think I have any of that stuff anymore, but I have continued with one thing she taught me. She gave me a beat up can full of change. She said if I always keep my change in this can, I will never be broke. That can died a long time ago, but I replaced it before I threw the other away. And I still keep my change. It's come in handy over the years.

Anyway, it was a Friday night, and my boyfriend and I drove to their town, went to the hospital, and I got to say goodbye. I felt more sorry for grandma that she would be alone, but I was thankful that he would be out of his pain and suffering. He had his first stroke several years earlier, and he hadn't been the same since.

Anyway, there were some misunderstandings with my family and me that weekend, and I ended up driving back home that night, too, and stayed awake for over 24 hours. The next day, we got the call that grandpa had passed away. It was my sister's birthday, December 24th.

I know that Don didn't want to go with me to the funeral because of all of the hard feelings with my family, but he sucked it up and went with me. I was really surprised and a little confused. We all got together after the funeral, and he actually acted decently, which again, surprised me. He was supportive of me, too. Odd.... very odd.

So, 1984 was a very difficult year. This whole relationship with him had gone on since January, starting and stopping, again and again. One year down of the nine years of him hurting and manipulating my life. Only one year down.